Radical Self-Love - Yeah, Right

Radical Self-Love - Yeah, Right I know Im not alone.   There are, sadly, a lot of women who have major challenges with loving or even liking themselves.   So whats this thing called radical self-love?   And just how am I supposed to achieve radical self-love when sometimes I cant even look at myself in the mirror? Judging   Myself? I consider myself a fairly caring and empathetic person.   I try to see the world from behind the eyes of those I interact with.   So if you asked me if I was judgmental, Id give you a quick no in reply. Or am I? While Im neither a church goer nor what youd call religious (I do consider myself spiritual in a new-agey kind of way), I do remember some of the teachings I heard when I was very young.   Even at the tender age of 4 or 5, these resonated with me and I adopted them as my guideposts: Do unto others . . . Forgive easily, often, and repeatedly Go the extra mile Walk a mile in the other persons shoes And then there were those teachings that felt right, but I couldnt quite comprehend them or at least how to live them.   Like love yourself as your neighbor, for example.   Love my neighbor.   Got it.   Love myself as my neighbor?   You can insert a puzzled look or blank stare emoticon here. Maybe Someday . . . Most women have a very ingrained if not genetically implanted habit of caring for others first. Ourselves?   Well, well get around to that.   Someday.   But the message is clear:   we dont matter, at least not as much. The mirage of someday is a hopeless surrender to never     In todays world that also makes it very easy to fall into the trap of questioning (judging?) ourselves, asking am I really doing enough?   And from there, am I enough?    So we plod along through life, striving for at least a degree of self-acceptance or self-esteem that is enough to keep us going. About That Judgment Thing   . . . If you didnt just have a little aha moment, let me help you.   If what Ive said resonates even a little, its time to recognize that youve been judging yourself. But thats not so bad, you say, because at least Im not judging others.   Or are you? Judgment, in one way or another, is measuring.   So youre measuring yourself.   Measuring is a way of putting a value on something more or less than, good or bad, or worse than or better than.    So measuring yourself means youre placing yourself somewhere on the continuous line that includes everyone.   And in judging ourselves, were effectively judging everyone. That was my aha moment.    When I finally made sense of that youthful teaching love yourself as your neighbor.   Meaning, I cannot truly love others until I really love myself.   Until I first let go of all of my self-judgments. And.   Accept.   Me.   Right where I am. Now That You Know . . . Letting go of all my self-judgments is a huge order.   But Im going to work on it, and stop saying someday. If youd like a ton more insights about this topic, Id recommend the book The Body Is Not An Apology by Sonya Renee Taylor.   Thats what started me thinking about all of this.   I should have known something was cooking inside me when I even shied away from the book at first, because I didnt like the cover. But trust me, its an awesome read that will get you to examine some pretty important stuff about yourself. And maybe, with a little radical self-love, start doing life differently.